Dear Diary, 

  sometimes, i wish the world would just end before i wake up.

and then i think of all the people i will miss, all the things i want to do, 

how badly i want to see my future and then i unwise the wish.

Dear Diary
 Today i had a fight with my boyfriend and now i am sitting on my bed ,
all by myself with no one to talk to. he's really the only person i can talk to
but how do i talk to my boyfriend about my boyfriend when we are fighting.
Sometimes i wish you could talk............

Dear Diary

Today i did something really bad and i am very sorry.
i know and i believe God will forgive me because its true,
but there is still this thing that keeps asking me if He really would.
sometimes i thing it will help if He'd just tap me on my shoulder and say
I FORGIVE YOU MY CHILD!!

Dear Diary

I am lonely. i have friends and i have family but at night when all is said and done and i lie on my bed, i feel so alone...in fact, i know i am alone. i have tried to stand and i am failing and i know sooner or later i will fall completely. i cant take it anymore. .............dear diary, i am dying!!

P.S ...just writing, fiction and reality intertwined!!

behind the tough exterior

 we see, we judge and  we conclude.
we hear, we judge and we conclude.
 never pausing to think or to wonder
 what lies behind the tough exterior.

 like a soldier dressed for war,
 like the tortoise or the sea turtle
 like hard surface of the earth,
 like the overly annointed man of God

like the girl who lost her father and still wears a smile
like the ice queen at your office or your school
like the phone or the computer(try dropping yours from 10 floors up)
 like hard rock music.

WHAT LIES BEHIND THE TOUGH EXTERIOR????

Inspiration

So it was summer time and there was really nothing to do. most of my colleagues had gone back to their homes, even my housemates had left and i was home alone. hmmm, home alone, so i move in with some friends of mine who are still around, not many and we do some fun stuff, all along i think, i want to start a new hobby, something different, so i decide i would learn to fotoshop pictures which should keep me  busy enough throughout summer but then again, i remember the  time when i used to write,write stories, both long and short and i miss that time and the joy writing brought me and so i wonder.
           hmmm, was it med' school because it looks like it, i even read less now(novels i mean) or is it that i just lost my inspiration, that drive, that thing that caused my pen to move over sheets and sheets of paper with ease. yes, i think i lost it, and right now, i don't care how or when. i want it back and i know i am going to find it.....somehow. not exactly sure what i want to write or do with this blog, but am gonna figure it out soon enough

ps. am gonna have fun here.......hehehe